While I couldn’t smell anything Amy always complained I smelled of death when I worked in the basement. I spent an extra long time washing with the ...ancy french soaps Amy kept in the shower. As I was drying, I heard my wife walk into the bedroom. She bumped into the closet door, her dresser, the end of the bed, and one of the night tables. I guess they must have stopped for a drink or three. I walked out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel. Amy pushed past me and got on her knees to worship. ” I force myself to walk normally to the restaurant exit, but my legs sprint to the car as soon as I am outside. Run, woman, run! You have a date to prepare for!I zoom through every yellow light getting home to prepare for whatever it is that is going to happen later. Better safe than sorry, right? The first order of business is a shave down below. Due to my lack of activity of late, things have grown a little jungle-like down there.And then there is the subject of my underwear. Ugh. No time to. She had just given me a swift kick in the balls. I couldn’t believe it. Talk about unexpected. She looked down at me without bothering to get up from her chair. ‘You will not wag your head at me, young man. What do you think this is, a barn? And what are you, a horse or a goat? When I ask you a question you will answer with words, in the form of ‘yes, Miss Frobisher’ or ‘no, Miss, Frobisher.’ If you’re a good boy, I’ll let you use the short form ‘Miss F_. Now get up and stand on your own two. I knew he could speak English from the hideous outbursts I’d heard before. But then I realised what the squeak was for.“James? Get back inside! What are you doing interfering with Alex’s work?” Satan roared as he stepped out of the door. “I was just giving him a snack! He needs a break!” I said, and Alex seemed to perk up at the idea of his new saviour. Which was odd, as I only gave him biscuits...“No he doesn’t, now get back inside now! And you Alex, you know what happens when you slack.
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I lifted my rightfoot to see past my fluffy skirt. The bandage that had been wrappedaround my ankle was gone. I wiggled my foot a little; there was no
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